…I GUESS! I kinda don’t really know what the heck is happening! My kid literally says things that I don’t understand how he knows when or how to say them or why he even understands what they mean. I feel like my head is stuck in a vaccum of confusion when it comes to this little guy! I just don’t get it…or him! His dad says he’s too smart for everyone’s good…and I’m starting to think he’s right. My mom says I can’t let him see me sweat, but it’s kind of hard not to look like a deer caught in headlights when he just lays one on me!
First of all the little rascal has a freakin’ answer for everything I say! EVERYTHING! And usually it makes a lot of freakin’ sense! And it annoys me! He’s clever, brilliant and charming…basically a recipe for parenting disaster! Sometimes his logic is spot on and it makes me sick! LOL! You see this is when you find yourself repeating that golden phrase, “Because I said so!” . I never thought I would utter those words, but when you have a kid who just debunked your whole theory on why he should go to bed, the only tactic left to use is your physical authority! I’m older, bigger and therefore in charge, so shut up and go to sleep! UGH!
So the other night I’m getting Jax ready for bed and he’s just fighting it the whole way. I put on a shirt, turn around to grab the pants, he takes it off. Then I ask him if he would like to dress himself, he declines, so I continue. Then he steps out of pants to grab a toy. I scold, take toy away and bring him back to pants. Suddenly he fancies a jig. And he jigs so hard that it’s hard for me to try to put the pj’s on him! Seriously?! Are we doing this right now?!
Me: Jaxon, stop playing around. It’s time to put on your pajamas.
Jax: I don’t want to putting on my pajamas
Me: Well, I’m sorry. But you have to. It’s 7:30, which means its bedtime. You’re late getting ready for bed, so you need to hurry and put on your pajamas.
Jax: I don’t have bedtime at seven firty today.
Me: Yes you do.
Jax: No. I don’t have a go to bed. It’s Wednesday. Tomorrow is Firsday. I don’t have to go to school on Firsday. So I not having go to bed at seven firty!
*Insert Deer Look*
Me: There’s no such thing as Firsday! Go to bed!
Jax: I not saying FIRSDAY… I saying FUUUURRRSSS DAY! And no I don’t wanna go to bed!
Me: Guess it doesn’t matter that you don’t have school tomorrow. It’s 7:30 and you are going to bed!
*Insert Toddler Whine Fest*
Jax: I don’t want to! Why???
Me: Because I said so!
End Scene