Single Mommy Dilemma

Ever feel like the pressure is on every time you walk out of the house when you’re a single mom on the prowl. Oh yea I’m on the prowl! LOL! I missing that companionship and feeling the weight of the ticking biological clock tick tocking in my ear! At the same time trying to figure out what I want and need the most out of a relationship. I need to meet new men and broaden my horizons a bit. But I have to leave the house first and being a single mom makes that a wee bit hard! Even harder when you’ve spent most of your single time in a bed being sick. Now, I’m not so sick, yet still a single mother. I’ve got a whole new body, frame of mind and a plumbing… time to hit the streets… in a way! But when the heck did I stop feeling sexy? And why do I know more about what’s going on on NickJr than the new exhibit at the LACMA?!

Why does it feels like a sin as a single woman to walk the streets of Los Angeles after dropping Jax off at school in my mommy uniform of sweats, sneakers and a tank? I might as well stamp the word MOMMY on my head. I’m mean I am a mother. That’s who I am now! I have a child? Why is it wrong to look the part sometimes? But its starting to feel more like all the time. I feel like hermit mother all the time. The feeling of “You’re Never Gonna Get A Date” creeping up my neck. On the rare occasions that I do get to go out, it not only feels like I’m breaking out of jail, but that I need to make the night count! I need to socialize, have fun, relax and look cute all at the same time! It’s very stressful!! Tonight is one of those nights. I actually have a babysitter to watch my son so that I can go enjoy my brothers’ performance and I’m sitting here stressing about what to wear and how not to fall asleep while out. It use to be that I could just go out and have a beer or a glass of wine down the street alone or with a girlfriend… now every outing is a big deal. I gotta beat the face, coif the hair, tighten in the stomach and push up the boobs for three hours of freedom. LOL! I remember seeing single moms in the lounges and bars “making it count” and I didn’t get it! Why couldn’t they just throw on a pair of jeans and a top? Oh well because there is maybe a few hours out of a month where you feel sexy or look sexy! And jeans just don’t cut it anymore when you smell like goldfish and have pacifiers flying out of your purse. Relearning how to flirt with dried applesauce stuck to your favorite vintage Fendi is just not a good look people! *insert large exacerbating sigh here* So it’s time to get to the closet and my only two options are Mommy or Slutty…UGH! Gosh, seriously?! Isn’t there a happy medium? Can’t you be a sexy mom who’s almost thirty who’s tired but only because she works so hard at being a mom so that’s why she’s sexy? Can’t I put on a miniskirt and a sweater without someone making a comment acting like the fact that I look like a woman is a rare occurrence which will drive me into hiding for the rest of the night while I slowly sip a glass of wine because I am too sleepy to really drink? *sucks in deep breath and screams* AAAARRRGGGHHH!!!

Alright I’ve said my peace. Now let me find a five hour, shave my legs and begin the transformation so I can make it out of here by 9pm!